Do you ever experience those moments when you look back on your life, or even just your day, and think, "How blessed I am by the friends and experiences I've had in my life?"
As I prepare to move into a new little chapter of life, I can't help but be grateful for the blessings I've been given up to this point. The late-night theology discussions, the giddy friendship discoveries, the kind listening, and supportive cheering-each-other-on are just some of the experiences I have been thankful for lately. Looking back even farther, I can't help but smile at all the experiences, the religious instruction, the musical formation, the quiet retreats, the rambling adventures, and times with God that have shaped me into the woman I am today, not to mention all the people who have crossed my path and even become wonderful friends along the way. Looking at old photos on Facebook, on the family computer, and even in albums is a dear pastime for me. They bring back such wonderful and diverse memories, resurfacing good times, struggles, hopes, joys, friendships, and life.
My life has not been as exciting as some, but maybe some would say it's been more exciting than theirs. I think that each person's life is unique; no two people have the same one, and so each one is special. My life is special; your life is special, and all our lives are filled with blessings and meaning. In our hurried, stressed, and comparison-driven culture, it is important to take this step back and examine our lives in their own light, not in light of anyone else's.
When you do this, it may be easy to spot the difficulties and the heartache, but I hope it will also be easy for you to remember and relish the joys, the blessings. They come in all sizes and kinds. I treasure the multi-state road trip I took with family friends after I graduated from high school, as well as the fun little talks I've had with students after tutoring when they show me a favorite toy. Even more than the experiences, I think the memories of the people throughout my life are what bring me joy. It is amazing how many friends you can make; whether you know them intimately for years or only briefly, each person is unique and unrepeatable, and it is a joy to have made their acquaintance.
Humans were created to live together in a family and community. Whether your family or community is those you've grown up with or found along your way in life, they're an incredible gift from God and make life so rich! All of life's experiences would be nowhere near as exciting or meaningful if other people weren't a part of them. Imagine that special birthday party, or church picnic, without friends and family, or maybe more accurately, without connection. These connections are what bring us together and create the friendships we hold dear. Sometimes it can be hard to connect despite the internet "connected" age we exist in. This is why it is more important now than ever before to foster these connections, to slow down and actually listen to what someone is saying in a conversation, to reach out to a new person, to help someone in need, to share a smile or laugh over the seemingly small things, because we're losing them.
I know it sounds extremely cliché to say, "be present," but it is increasingly difficult to actually be present, even with ourselves. As I drove home after tea with a friend, I turned on my music and jammed away as I drove, but as I did so, I realized I wasn't completely present in my driving. Yes, I was paying attention to the road, but I was also somewhere else in the music and the lyrics. My drive home had become second nature and almost passed by unnoticed. Compare that to the drives home from friends' homes years ago when I sat in the back seat of our family minivan just staring out the window at the starry sky above, contemplating my own thoughts, or conversing with family in the car. I was present in the drive, and I was present with those around me. Even more so, we are less present today with others in public, in our homes, even at events, with the distractions of our phones, our "lives" on the internet. How can we make connections when we are connected more to the small white screen in our hands?
At this same tea outing with a friend, when she got up momentarily from the table, I was tempted to whip out my phone and check it. Check for what? Notifications? Who would be needing my attention? No one, really. I fought the urge in that instant and instead decided to look around. Ah, that is something we don't do as often now because we immediately look down at our phones. To my delight, I noticed the cute decor on the walls, the live cactus plants with their tiny thorns and soft leaves in the planter behind our booth, and the water spigot mounted directly into the hutch that housed the water cups and to-go boxes. I made connections, and I noticed life. Now imagine doing that when people are present, too. I have certainly checked my phone on impulse, out of habit, when with others, only to find no pressing notifications, oftentimes none at all. In those moments, what could I have noticed? A friendly smile? Someone's new outfit? A witty remark? A forlorn look? A need for care? All these things create those connections that we will remember infinitely longer than the pesky notifications. As we look back, those connections are life. They weave the fabric of our memories and make us who we are. As I get older and life seems to pass more quickly each year, I can't help but think of all the moments and connections I've missed, but also the ones yet to be made.
Now I look to the future as I move to a new place and look forward to new friendships, new connections, that will bring joy, shape me, try me, and ultimately become beautiful memories. God is continually blessing us moment to moment, year to year. I don't want to miss these blessings. I want to be able to look back on my young adulthood with fondness and a full heart. I want to enjoy the friendships I have and will have. I want to be a good friend so others will have these beautiful memories too. May we be able to look back in the years to come and see many beautiful memories and friendships that have enriched our lives and brought us closer to eternal happiness.
P.S. I cannot believe this, but I wrote this on the eve of National Best Friends Day without knowing it! How ironic and providential is that?!
